Consult Construx #27:13:00 AMConstrux Nunchux
Thanks for joining us again in a series of public service posts, Consult Construx (or As cXnX Sees It), where we finally give back to the faithful Chux Chazerz with queries they know only one ridiculous website can quell. We look forward to hearing from you soon! Enjoy.
(This week's Construx Counsel consists of Paul, Ryan and Ian.)
Youngsville, PA asks
|Step 1: Being Scared|
|Don't feel bad, I forget I'm dead too.|
After your name gets processed and it gets into the system it gets inspected by the data integrity clerk. To check the processors work for accuracy and proper spelling.
In case you haven't noticed Hell is very bureaucratic solely for the fact that it is Hell, and not made to be easy on anyone.
When the DIC (data integrity clerk) approves your file it gets put into a giant file to be sent to the big man himself ... Santa Clause. Santa runs your name through his data base to see your annual behavior index. If you fall into the nice pile you get filed under "nice" and if you were naughty you get filed under "naughty".
The nice pile get "rush" treatment as Satan wants first crack at your soul and the naughty pile gets put into a supplementary bin to handle any run-over need for souls.
|this might take me a little while ...|
The people's names who were scared half to death and that were judged to be naughty gets put into a giant fishbowl in Satan's rec room (which is a constant source of conversation during parties). Once you name is in the fishbowl your soul/life are on borrowed time. Once you get scared half to death again ....
your mom, asks
"Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played a girl bunny?"
RYAN: What a fantastic question! Thanks, Ryan. I realize this question may be different depending on who you ask, but because of Bugs Bunny and my back story I feel I may be able to answer this question best. If this gets awkward, I apologies. Feel free to accept my answer of yes, and if you want more please continue to read.
I will never forget the first time I saw Bugs Bunny as a women.. Of course when I saw this, I did not realize she was in fact Bugs Bunny in drag. I just thought it was a beautiful women. At the time, I thought "she" was the most beautiful women I had ever laid eyes on (since Jessica Rabbit, I may need mental help). Unlike my buddies who also found "her" attractive, I felt I would take it to the next level. Sure, like my friends I could of spent the rest of my life wondering what could of been or I could of taken action. And that is exactly what I did.
Luckily for me I knew the owner of George P. Dog. (If you don't recall this character, it was the dog who Foghorn Leghorn would torment) He got me her number (Bugs) and it was not long after that we were talking on the phone. Within a week of talking we started hanging out.
|Date in the woods.|
|Date at my place|
After a few months had passed, after dating a few other women I ended up deciding that I had to at least get closure. I carried my insecurities into all of the following relationships and I knew I had to do something. I needed closure.. Knowing that she would never give me the time to get this, I decided there was only one option. I would record a video and leave it outside her rabbit hole. This way I could get everything off of my chest, and move on... Sorry for the quality, the video is from a old VHS tape..
I would rather not discuss this any further... In short, yes. I did find Bugs Bunny attractive when he played a girl bunny. Thank you for your question, Ryan. We sincerely hope you continue to follow the site and ask more great questions in the future!.
IAN: The cool culinary cutthroats here at Construx definitely have a few suggestions for you. First off, here's a link to our favorite recipe: Click Here!
Wow!!! Did you see that?!
Now that we're back on the same page, what's to be done about the butter in your rolls. Many recipes are composed in different ways, and there isn't even a consensus on what constitutes a lobster roll exactly. Here's our version of the classic, complete with step by step instructions:
Got it? Still confused? Need a wet wipe? Neither are we. As it stands, there are no lobster roll police, which is a shame, but also means that you're free to make any substitutions on any constitutions you see fit. Here's an example:
You don't even have to use lobster!!! Get creative, G!!! Just as one final point, we do want to direct you to the closest **approved** historical approximation of the origination of lobsters. Here.
I can't believe it!!! Twice in the same post!!!