banana sandwich comeback

Banana Sandwich #3: Drunk Dougie Pluggin

7:58:00 PMConstrux Nunchux

What's Hot: Plugs  

Ian: Oh, okay, thanks for having me backUh-huh.  Well, yes, I'm over that problem.  I don't want to talk about it, really.  Yeah, yeah, I got this book about my life coming out where I talk all about it.  Mmm.  Mm-hm. Mm-hm.   And this movie I'm in.  And I'm getting married... or divorced??  Oh, wait. Married so I can get divorced to this new person I like very much.  I like it all very much; my...  Substances?  Yes.  My fifth.  Oh, and my record.  Yes, let's talk about my record.  Not that record!  This one.  Yes, it was made with the advent of electricity, teehee... So, you'll notice my hair, my ha-My.  Hair.  Here.  Yes.  (Aaannnnd Broadway ssshhhhhhh....)

[Ed. note- In all seriousness, everyone likes some recognitions and everybody has something, no matter how worthless, that they want to draw attention to. At cXnX,we are 100% about promoting causes and creativity, our own and others'. Also, we've individually and collectively experienced electric shocks on more than one occasion.]


What's Not:  The Dougie X

Paul:
Last year EVERYBODY was doing the Dougie, pop stars, kids, cats, it was THE dance to do for those in "the know". Now we here at CXNX want ... no NEED our visitors to be up to date on all developing trends, and shifts in culture. If you don't know what "the dougie" is here is an example below:




Catchy? Of course! I've even been know to drop a Dougie, or two in a pinch, but now a days The Dougie is simply something that should be left behind like The Superman, or even The Macarena. 

When I broke the news to Cali Swag District front-man M-Bone, he tried several different proposals, and several new experimental dances. The only one I considered was the Flippy:


I rejected it due to the impracticality of doing it in "da club". M-bone was devistated, and left Construx Castle a broken an dejected man. I never heard from him again, I hope he's OK I left him a few voicemails. 

What is actually on the horizon is anyone's guess. We all had fun doing the Dougie, but like most great things it's time is over. Keep your eye open for the "Ninja Wobble"


and fresh out of Europe, I've seen the kids in London do The Destructor:


Finally coming from Brazil they call this Ultimo de Bango:


The future of dancing is now open for any creative mind, or talented performer. Being on the cutting edge of dancing is a hard job, but I consider it my commitment to you. Keep watching for developing trends, and now you are educated.


Comeback: Drunken Boxing

Paul:
We all know by now that regular kung-fu is played out.


This man is not drunk, but probably should be...




















The fate of the first known combatant to face the Drunken Boxing style.



Ian:  That's right, Paul! And you know what else, Mean Gene? Drunken Boxing (not this...) is an undefeated martial arts style. If we're to trust the fictional biographies of all the characters in the legitimate release and bastardized sequels, this form has been around for centuries, and never been dissed!  You'd better believe that's a long time, brother.  Not only that, it combines full-on revelry and icy discipline all in one incomprehensibly difficult and deceptively simple package.  So this week we fully recommend you start practicing one of the official drunken styles and run out into the streets with your new found ability, because with everyone exhibiting the Drunken style, who knows what amazing new martial arts hybrids might accidentally be created.



A face you can trust, while he's kicking in your face. Why not?
 


"Not again!  You construx doods r too too Much-aaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!"



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