Ask a Clemente 3/18
Finally we need you to be honest. You say you're neighbor's "really great" and "sexy" so, who is it you're really jealous of? Are you upset because your amazingly attractive neighbor doesn't find you interesting enough to stain??? It also might just be that your husband is actually a really interesting guy. Maybe there isn't anyone to be jealous of in the first place. It looks like you haven't considered the obvious.
Ian: One word. Threesome.