guts hey dude

You Nostalgia, You lose

4:58:00 PMcanaan




In terms of the greatest things that ever happened in your life, if given a top 25, at least one of the following programs (all Nickelodeon) better be listed in that list or your humanity is in question.

Whether it may be the nicktoons line-up that debuted in 1991, or the ever-so-awesome SNICK
line-up that debuted in the fall of 1992,
these were some epic pieces of television.



Ren and Stimpy -- I'm sure watching this cartoon today may cause some serious damage to the old brain cells, but in your youth, Ren and Stimpy was enthralling television. From the all-too-epic anthem to the hit game "Don't Whiz on the Electric Fence" to the mind-numbingly simple "Happy Happy Joy Joy", Canadian animator John Kricfalusi hit pay dirt.

The lead characters, Ren Hoek and Stimpson J. Cat were two loving, and at
times, excruciatingly painfully over-the-top dog/cat combo that were epic displays of lunacy and dimwittedness that can barely be held comparable, even in today's simplistic television landscape.

Canaan's banana sandwich scale of awesomeness:
4.25 Banana Sandwiches


Hey Dude -- From the ridiculous to the sublime, Hey Dude was a straight forward and earnest (no, I didnt say Mr. Earnst) lighthearted sitcom (but with tinges of dramedy at times) about a cityslicker heading out west to take over a dude ranch entitled "Bar None." Hey Dude was Nickelodeon's first foray into live action television programming and it was a relative hit with its limited audience. The cast was a bunch of no-names and never will be's (outside of an awesome cameo of Mr. Earnst in "Erin Brockovich"), except for the breakout star of the show, a young Christine Taylor (Brady Bunch Movie, Curb Your Enthusiasm, etc). This show was pretty friggin' awesome...even if Ted's native american friend was annoying as all shit.


Canaan's banana sandwich scale of awesomeness:
2.50 Banana Sandwiches

Are You Afraid of the Dark? -- The SNICK line up was nickelodeon's attempt at a prime time line-up in the same vein as the popular TGIF that was ABC. The Canadian/American mashup of slight comedy and horror, AYFOTD? was an excellent bring back to those cheap paperback horror short story collection books you used to read in elementary school that made you almost crap your pants. The best episodes involved Zebo the Clown, or the mall that was setup like a pinball game. Zebo the Clown was the cause of wetbeds in a lot of households across the USA in 1991-1992--theres no doubt about it.

The best part: episodes are easily watchable on youtube--still quality as ever.

Canaan's banana sandwich scale of awesomeness:
3.75 Banana Sandwiches


Guts--Anybody who was anybody wanted to take stab at the Aggrocrag--and Moira Quirk. They both had steep peaks and had something foreign about them that screamed "climb on me." Guts was a simpler, more straight to the point version of Legends of the Hidden Temple, but didn't have some fruitcake in a pair of super tight khaki shorts yelling at you to assemble your monkey faster. Plus, Guts had Mike O'Malley as the host, which is pretty badass. Oh, and Moira Quirk.

Canaan's banana sandwich scale of awesomeness:
2.75 Banana Sandwiches

Clarissa Explains It All--The show kinda sucked, but Clarissa was pretty tasty on the eyes--at least my 11 year old self thought so.

Canaan's banana sandwich scale of awesomeness:
0.50 Banana Sandwiches




Honorable Mentions: Doug, Rocko's Modern Life, What Would You Do?, Double Dare, Legends of the Hidden Temple, Rugrats, Pete & Pete

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6 Construxive Remarx

  1. Ren and stimpy was toit

    ReplyDelete
  2. Only 2.75 bananas for GUTS? EAT MY ASS

    ReplyDelete
  3. FUCK CANAAN. HE'S A TOOL.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Just kidding, I like canaan.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I will always hold a special place in my heart for Nicktoons and SNICK. You should do a Part 2 with Roundhouse, Doug, and Salute Your Shorts.

    ReplyDelete
  6. i like where your head's at, mahramo.

    ReplyDelete

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