I found this on Canaan's facebook page in his inbox (yes I found access to his account) I thought I would post this visual embarrassment to confidently prove that I am the right one to take control of this website:
As part of this smear campaign that Ian and Paul have thrown at me, they have given me access to post a message about the voting and what not. I never asked for any of this. I was merely trying to get my 40 of malt liquor that I rightfully won and I must've interrupted Ian's fart huffing seminar because he got super pissed that I would "make this up" and "tarnish the reputation of CXNX."
One thing led to another, things got more intense, and I challenged Paul and Ian for control of CXNX (Kind of like Kevin Costner in the movie "The Postman" ...except a lot less gay).
(Ian's probably never seen this movie, because he hates Hollywood. He hates Hollywood because its in America and we all know how he feels about America)
that being said, this is why you should vote for Canaan:
If you guys are tired of watching Paul and Ian reminisce about what color mittens they had when they were 6 and want to read some random/fun stuff (and yes, more Kevin Costner references), Give me the reigns and let me do work.
In closing, the only thing that would be a better idea than letting me have control of CXNX would be re-booting the Sliders series.
(if you didn't think Dr. Arturo was the man, you are dead to me)
...ill also make CXNX visually readable (it looks like an ADHD diarrhea'ed all over the place) and perhaps put an end to autoplaying music every time you visit the site... or just change the music to something a little better than Andrew WK...ill perhaps even take requests--something the elitist Clemente's would never do.
But that's it for me. Thanks for reading. now get out there and vote (i will not post a p. diddy picture, but now you're thinking about him).
p.s. Ian still hates America. ...and drawing ability as per his "incredible" renderings he made earlier.
1 Construxive Remarx